Besides the emotional trauma that divorcees experience, there is another side of divorce that causes trouble, and that is the financial side of it. Men and women are concerned about their financial survival during the divorce. Studies show that women suffer from divorce-induced financial problems longer than men, but take less time to recover emotionally.
Combining factors that lower women’s post-divorce living standards are different – losing important years of career growth or inadequate child support that will cover real costs of child rearing. Pay attention to these post-divorce financial troubles, because it may be an important piece of advice if you are going through a divorce yourself.
- Large expenses
When the divorce process starts, expenses will begin to pile up – court costs, legal fees, new living expenses, and therapist bills. All this drains your account, while the money you used to support one household now must be used to support two. In order to stay afloat, start accumulating the necessary funds.
- Obtaining documents
Before your process begins, obtain copies of every single financial record – financial statements, loan applications, banking information, wills, tax returns, car registration, insurance policies, and credit card statements. If you have property that was a family gift or inheritance, copy records that are the proof of owning separate property. Obtaining your partner’s business records is also valuable, because it can show you whether there are any hidden assets.
- Proper preparation
Ignorance is certainly not bliss when it comes to divorce. It is a complicated process and requires thorough preparation. Inform yourself about the subject and read about regulations of legislature (divorce laws in California, Illionis and Michigan can be regulated differently) and how they are implemented. Timing of the separation is also important, because everything is still community property until you separate. So, before you pack your bags, get things like car maintenance or kid’s dental problems done. Be an active participant in your own divorce, not a passive observer. It will help you recover quickly and give you a sense of control over the process. After it is over, you will have better sharing of information about the kids, less conflict, and better compliance with your ex-spouse. Fight for what is yours and what you believe you deserve.
- Mixing emotion and money
You must try to be as dispassionate as possible. Do not look at your attorney as a confidante, but rather as a paid professional. Visit a family member or a friend at times when feelings overwhelm you, not your attorney. Property division should be based on your long-term best interest. Do not get vengeful and declare war, but put some effort to end everything with as little malice as possible.
- Being left without a career
It often happens that people stop concentrating on their careers in order to raise their family, usually women. After you get divorced, you must find a way to support your children and yourself. Get your career back on track, start learning, reading, and gaining experience through practical work. It will boost your self-esteem, which is needed after a divorce.
- Not being prepared for the worst outcome
Going through a divorce will bring a lot of changes to your life, and you should be mentally prepared for everything. What if the divorce lasts for years and you spend all your money? What if your ex-spouse refuses to pay child support? Do not fear, but do not let anything surprise you by planning for the worst. Always try to take control.
In the end, you need all the help you can get. Make sure you get good professional advice and consultation. Even if you find an attorney that is a bit expensive, if he or she is a proven expert in the field, you should pay for valuable consultation. Also, if you have troubles with going through your divorce emotionally, you will need a good therapist.